Where oh where to begin…. let’s start with the days are now all running together due to the severe lack of sleep the past 2 1/2 weeks. When I say lack I mean none, surprisingly I’m still functioning just fine. No hallucinations yet, but that is yet to be see if it really will happen. Sure my body needs the sleep but it can get all the rest it needs when I’m dead.
Next one the list… there’s always room for changing things in my life. One of them is changing what I listen to from people now. There’s too much sugar coating and everyone is putting on an act for me to really take everyone to complete heart. There are a lot more things to change but that’s for my own personal reasons.
Finally something that I need to ensure happens are my plans for my family, future family and present. I can’t have all of my well thought out plans go up in smoke, it’s just not something I allow happen.
one should have an issue with this many sleepless nights… so far I haven’t yet.
Talk about what you want to be when you grow up, and who do you imagine yourself marrying?
Well this is a bit difficult to do but I’ll do it, I always wanted to be a Navy SEAL and to have a doctrine in psychology and sociology. Marrying well she knows who she is, we were once and I am going to find away to make it happen again only this time make it permanent; her name is Alexandra Carrin
I feel it stretching deep within my very essenceclawing, screaming, screeching to break freeI keep fighting it, doing all I can to keep it’s silencebut how much longer will it take until it consumes all of me
the seed has been nurturedallowed to growcausing the utmost amount of tortureto all of those that I know
there can’t be much left in methe light slowly fades, flickeringthe chaos consumes and ensnares the of what I could bethere isn’t much living within this vessel that is sickening
I just want to rip the flesh from my bonespour out the blood of my very lifespare all those within any form of life to ever knowthere is a creature biding it’s time to take your very life
why did I let it come to thishow did I not see it happen sooner than nowI guess there is only one thing to wishand that is a wish for me to finally be torn down
if it continues to grow, tears will fallconsequences I’ll feel no form of shame or regret towardsthere is only death for the demon inside my wallbut for such a death to occur my life must end for life to move forward
There is no strength inside of this burning flameonly disaster awaits those who try to guideI’m sorry but I’m the only one to take such a blamethere is no reconcile for myself as much as I’d like to try
there is a burning flame that is flickering and dyingthe tides are turning with the moon waning and waxingI keep on but it’s becoming the end of my attempt in tryingthere isn’t much worth for me than the other’s lives to become so taxing
With each passing second there the strength in me dwindlesfalters and sways to the darkness of it allHow do I reignite this flame if there is no timber and kindlethere soon will be nothing but the downward fall